There are several ways to address boundary violations. One of them is to allow the person to burn themselves out.
A long time ago, I worked for a severe micromanager who overruled pretty much any decision I made. I’m talking even down to the color I used to highlight cells in my spreadsheet.
For material matters, I would push back sometimes and explain why I thought a particular approach was more effective. It didn’t change anything, so I decided to go in the opposite direction.
👉 I stopped making any decisions when it came to working with them. I made them decide every detail of every assignment. Regardless of the size or significance.
After a couple of months, they started to insist that I learn how to make decisions on my own.
On the surface, this approach appears passive-aggressive. However, my intent wasn’t to punish my manager, but to change their pattern of behavior. So, I view it as strategic rather than punitive.
💡 Regardless of how you may interpret this solution, it is a viable alternative if you find yourself in a similar situation. However, like any boundary-setting approach, there are risks associated with it. So, buyer beware.
References: Watzlawick P, Weakland JH, Fisch R. Change: Principles of Problem Formation and Problem Resolution. WW Norton & Company; 1974.
Post Title: When someone keeps overstepping, instead of pushing back, try letting their own behavior do the teaching.